One student to another:"How are your English lessons coming along?"
"Fine, I used to be the one who couldn't understand the English men, and now it's the English men who can't understand me."
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1.Theircompanylogoistwotincansandalengthofstring.
2.Youcheckouttheiraddress,andit'saphoneboothconta...(查看全文)
Patient : How much to have this tooth pulled?
Dentist : $90.00.
Patient : $90.00 for just a few minutes work???
Dentist : I can extract it very slowly if you like. (查看全文)
Q:Howmanypoliticiansdoesittaketochangealightbulb?
A:Four,onetochangeitandtheotherthreetodenyit.
H...(查看全文)
1. Let's wash the car.
2. Has anybody seen the sideburn trimmer?
3. Come to think of it, I'll have...(查看全文)
Why can't blondes take coffee breaks?
They're too hard to retrain.
How do you know when a blonde h...(查看全文)
It is my sad duty to report that the Pillsbury Doughboy died yesterday of a yeast infection and comp...(查看全文)
Aguyisnotgettingalongwithhiswife. Hethinksmaybehe'dliketohaveapetandgoestoapetshop.Afterl...(查看全文)
How do crazy people go through the forest?
They take the psycho path.
How do you get holy water?
B...(查看全文)
Thereisthisguyandthisgirlandtheywanttohavesex.Sotheygotothegirlshouseandbefo...(查看全文)
Dad : "Son, how can you call your aunt stupid? Go and
say sorry to her"
Son : (goes over to the aunt) "Aunt, I am sorry you are
stupid.
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Somefolkshaveit,somedon't.
Thosewhohaveitwouldbedevastatedifitwereevercutoff.
Thosewhohaveitthinkt...(查看全文)
1. If you think you are fat, you probably are.
Do not ask us. We refuse to answer.
2. Learn to work...(查看全文)
1.Computersareunreliable,buthumansareevenmoreunreliable.
2.Atthesourceofeveryerrorwhichisblamedonth...(查看全文)
Theyhavefinallybeenreleased!ForthosenotfamiliarwiththeDarwinAward,It'sanannualhonorgiventotheperson...(查看全文)
Two blondes went to the market. While they were there, they each bought a horse. When they got home,...(查看全文)
1. I can't reach my license unless you hold my beer.
2. Sorry, Officer, I didn't realize my radar d...(查看全文)
Teacher: Desmond, your composition on "My Dog" is
exactly the same as your brother's. Did u copy his?
Desmond: No, teacher, it's the same dog! (查看全文)
An engineer dies and reports to hell. Pretty soon, the engineer gets dissatisfied with the level of ...(查看全文)
1) At lunch time, sit in your parked car with sunglasses on and point a hair dryer at passing cars. ...(查看全文)
Little Johnny was sitting in class one day. All of the sudden, he needed to go to the bathroom. He y...(查看全文)
Why do shops which are open 24/7 have locks on the doors?
If quitters never win, and winners never ...(查看全文)
she went into an hunted house and came out with an application
when she joined an ugly contest, th...(查看全文)
A lawyer opened the door of his BMW, when suddenly a car came along and hit the door, ripping it off...(查看全文)
Boy: Dad, when I grow up I want to e an Arctic explorer.
Father: That's fine, Bill.
Boy: But I want to go into training at once.
Father: Hoe so?
Boy: Well, I want a dollae a day for icecream so I'll get used to the cold(查看全文)
Teacher: "Where were u born?"
Student: "Singapore,
Sir." Teacher: "Which part?"
Student: "All of me, Sir."
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What's the last thing you usually hear before a redneck dies?
'Hey y'all... Watch this!'
How To Pi...(查看全文)
As I was trying to pack for vacation, my 3-year-old daughter was having a wonderful time playing on ...(查看全文)
A minister told his congregation,
"Next week I plan to preach about the sin of lying.
To help you ...(查看全文)
"Mum, teacher was asking me today if I have any
brothers or sisters who will be coming to school."
"That's nice of her to take such an interest, dear.
What did she say when u told her u are the only child?"
"She just said, 'Thank goodness!'"
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